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Friday, August 5, 2011

Big Brother Recap: Hail Daniele the Destroyer!


After a boneheaded use of the veto on Rachel and not himself, Brendon found himself staring down the barrel of Daniele's virtual 12-gauge Thursday night.

Could he possibly rally enough votes to stave off elimination and oust Jordan? Could he say "fiancee" any more often? Could he be any more of a douche?

We reveal the answer to all of these questions, as well as the identity of the new HoH, in our +/- recap of last night's Big Brother installment below ...

Brenchel

Minus 15 right off the bat, because while Brendon and Rachel act like God's gift to Big Brother, they are actually horrible players outside of the challenges.

Everyone dislikes them intensely. Their deals are good as far as you can throw them. All they have to do is have one off week and it's curtains. Minus 9.

That said, there is something maddeningly insane about Brenchel, and you tune in primarily to watch and root against louts such as them, so Plus 4.

Brendon makes a late bid to round up votes he could get - Shelly, Adam, Porsche - to stick around. Problem? He needs all three. Not happening. Minus 5.

When Porsche is telling you to cut the crap and step up your game play, that's a telling sign that Rachel has gone off the rails, likely irreparably. Plus 8.

While Rachel could, conceivably, turn this week into a positive, or at least try to mend fences with some of the other players, she just wails. Minus 6.

Plus 11 for the visual of sunglasses-wearing, chain-smoking Elf Adam.

Plus 7 for Evel Dick's commentary of Daniele's wheeling and dealing. He was a little harsh on his daughter, but his analysis should be a weekly thing.

For all his criticism, she ended up getting what she (and America) wanted with Brendon gone, and isn't in that bad of a position afterward. Plus 4.

Jordan Stays

Julie Chen's hair. There are no other words. Plus 9.

Jordan bought an eviction dress? Plus 7, because how cute is she, and while we hope to never see that dress ... we really want to see that dress!

"When every piece of fruit and vegetable she looks at reminds her of Brendon, I'm gonna rip my hair out." - Jeff, on Rachel sans Brendon. Plus 10.

Minus 3 for Porsche's throwaway vote against Jordan.

Minus 4 for the kiss Shelly blows in the Diary Room.

After being evicted (5-2), Brendon eschews hugs from the cast, reminding them of his "beautiful fiancee." Two words: Douche. Pocalypse. Minus 12.

Kalia triumphs and becomes the new Head of Household! Rachel? In big trouble. Evel Dick? Maybe a little too quick to write off Dani. Plus 14.

Next week's evicted guest will battle either Brendon, Dominic, Cassi or Keith - VOTERS decide which - for a chance to return. Vote Dom! Plus 5.

Minus 17 for the strong possibility of Brendon returning. It's been real, but we've had our fill of tears, boorishness and mentions of his effing PhD.

EPISODE TOTAL: +8. SEASON TOTAL: +46.

Did Brendon make the right call? Who should he have saved?

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